Talk about a download of inspiration.
A couple of years ago, I found this video on TED. How Movies Teach Manhood & I thought how important it was. Now, I'm not going to talk about that, necessarily, although it does tie into my current mode of thought process after watching the developing plot in Once's Snow White/Prince Charming (or Mary Margaret and David) story. If you don't know it, just watch the first season, or read a plot outline. There's a lot of relationship dynamic going on in both worlds.
Now, I am about as self sufficient as you can get. Granted, I know very little about cars, and probably couldn't change a tire if I tried. I also don't relish the thought of having to kill a cockroach or trap a mouse. But I am really good at taking care of myself. I have lived on my own for the most part for the past 7 years, and I am incredibly independent. I'm pretty sure the words "I don't need a man" have escaped my lips now and then. I believe it, too. I don't necessarily NEED a man, but for the heterosexual female (or even the lesbian...just change a few pronouns around), I have done some soul and heart digging in the past year and a half, ever since the break up with Greg, and into the new territory of scratching the surfaces of potential relationships.
This is important. I do not mean offense to either sex and hopefully I will offer a healthy balance of my heart's speech. I think, especially for those of us who grew up with a certain way of thinking about relationships and marriage, on either side of the coin, perhaps this can offer some insight and shed light on parallels that might be forgotten or misplaced.
When I was growing up, our youth pastor had us go through I Kissed Dating Goodbye as a group. I will spare you the gory details of my attempts to debate the absurdity of this book, but essentially, I completely and utterly disagreed. It invested the seed of shame and disgrace into the youth of my generation and I knew a LOT of people who got their hearts broken because of that book (which, ironically, was written with the intent to spare brokenheartedness). The book, if you haven't read it, is based on the idea that one should wait until they meet "the one God intended" before ever dating/giving your heart to someone else, etc.
The WORST analogy it gives paints a dream-like picture of a bride and groom standing at the altar on their wedding day. She's in white, he's in his tux, and all of a sudden, he sees a line of men standing behind is bride. When he inquires her about these men, she confesses to him that they are the men of her past, all of whom had a piece of her heart, but she's giving her groom what was left over.
What. A. Load. Of. Crap.
That analogy completely negates the entire message of the person of Jesus, who, if I recall my Bible correctly, is the author of redemption and doesn't care what you've done in your past, because he can make all things new and turn them for good. He can also heal in epic ways and remove the heartache of a breakup or divorce (I know this first hand). And dating someone and falling in love with them isn't a sin, the last time I checked. So I HATE HATE HATE this analogy. It's bull. If you've bought into it, let's talk. I'd like to introduce you to a few verses.
In any case, that's not why I'm writing this blog. Back to Once Upon A Time...
I've found that princesses always seem to be braver than their princes. In light of the more recent Disney films/shows, most of the story lines involve the princess saving the prince, or "more importantly", saving herself. Let's even look backward to The Little Mermaid. Feminists sometimes like to paint this story as "the girl who changed herself for a man", which I won't ignore...it is a weird message. But let's not ignore the fact that Ariel risked her life to save a drowning man who she hadn't even met, because she was brave and strong enough to do so. She was also willing to experiment and move to a new place where she couldn't talk, could barely walk, didn't know anybody, all to see if it would work out. I'm not suggesting any woman follow suit, but let's face it...that took guts.
Most of the story lines involving love stories have a moment where the princess "saves" her beloved somehow. Whether it's showing him that he truly is good deep down inside (ala Beauty & The Beast), or drinks poison intended for him (Tinkerbell in Peter Pan). And the feminist in me LOVES that. Yes, women are brave creatures. We are willing to risk plenty for the sake of others, not just our love interest. We put our hearts on the line for the ones close to us, and sometimes, it fails and it hurts, but we do it anyway. At least, I know I do it. And Snow White does too.
But here's the catch...
I have yet to see a prince in my own life risk something for me. You see, all of these love stories involve the prince turning around, knowing that the woman he loves has saved him in some way, so he unsheathes his sword to slay the dragon and take over the kingdom, all for the purpose of saving his beloved and his people. He typically risks everything. His fortune, his relationships, always his life. For the sake of saving someone who has offered him her heart.
Let's latch onto that idea real quick. Because I think we miss the most blatant parallel in existence.
Jesus, who became a man, a real man, with feelings and worries and nerve endings and a beating heart, risked EVERYTHING for us, even through fear (he was afraid of His own death), gave up his fortune and riches (the throne of Heaven) to become nothing (a poor man) so that he could win our hearts, all to give up his life to SAVE us.
How are we missing that? How did I MISS THAT? Talk about setting the bar. We talk about godly men, as if they are everywhere, as if meeting one is going to be quite easy and he'll be this and that and play the guitar (because it's a rite of passage if you're a Christian church-going male). But here's the thing... if he isn't willing to RISK ALL for your heart, no matter how amazing he is, it's probably best to wait a little while longer before latching onto him.
That being said, we're human. We have hurt. We have baggage. We have emptiness inside our hearts. We have lies being told to us that tell us it isn't worth it, that we aren't worth it and that it is impossible for true love to win.
Can we call BS on that?
I think Jesus likes Disney. I think Jesus is a fan of true love. I believe he WANTS us to find the person who makes us feel like singing and talking to small animals for no reason. He wants epic love stories for us. Not this pithy, petty games of the current day and age. He wants me, the woman, the beautiful, worthy, sweet Chelsea Brannon with a heart like His; a loyal heart, a deep loving heart, to save the man who turns right back around and holds that heart with tenderness, risking everything to keep it safe and healthy, reminding her that this heart is precious to him, and worthy of his everything.
I will find you.
I will always find you.
